twosidesofthesamepenis:

foolishcaptainkia:

gothamshitty:

kushdrinker:

sweet dreams are made of cheese

who am I to diss a brie

I cheddar the world and the feta cheese

gorgonzola wants to go hunting

spmib:

id rather stab myself repeatedly than fall for someone again and just be let down.

50shadesofsolkat:

skrillidex:

mom, dad, im roosterteeth

the bible said adam and eve not adam and swiss fucking cheese

seifukucat:

ah, the first day at my new job, better make a good impression *picks up briefcase* *trips over shoelaces* *briefcase spills open and hundreds of pokemon cards go flying into the lobby*

urinatings:

*sees my own post on my dash* *raven symone voice* yep, that’s me

multipack:

sorry but i think we should break up, it’s not you it’s-a-me mario

hungarian:

today in class someone sneezed & my teacher told them to shut up

pandyssian:

OH MY GOD APPARENTLY TAKING AN ARROW TO THE KNEE WAS AN OLD NORDIC SLANG FOR GETTING MARRIED 

I THOUGHT THAT ALL THOSE GUYS IN SKYRIM HAD LITERALLY BEEN SHOT IN THEIR KNEES WITH ARROWS BUT I GUESS NOT

AGGRESSIVELY REBLOG THIS IF YOUR FRIENDS ARE THE MOST ADORABLE LITTLE SHITS EVER (⊙‿⊙✿)

I’m actually really worried that nobody will ever fall in love with me. 

i either have the energy of a thousand condensed suns or i’m on the brink of going into hibernation and there is no inbetween

merriamwebsterdictionary:

reasons why winter is better than summer:

• little to no insects (◕‿◕✿) 
• sweaters all the time (◠△◠✿)
• the air is nice and fresh smelling (◡‿◡✿)
• sometimes it snows and you get out of school \(◕‿◕✿)/
• snow is pretty (´･ω･`)
• no pollen (▰˘◡˘▰) 
• it gets darker faster so theres more nighttime and more time to look at the stars (ᅌᴗᅌ* )
• everything is dead just the way i like it (⊙‿⊙✿)

awkwardvagina:

popcorn? no thanks i only eat heavymetalcorn